Friday, May 1, 2015

Molly Mormon Syndrome

Mother's Day is not one of my favorite days, probably due to I am not a "traditional Mother."
My husband and I lost our babies and never have experienced the joy of having our own two legged kids.  We are however, the proud parents of four legged kids; but alas on Mother's Day the four legged kids just don't make the cut in church.

When my mother was alive I loved to do special things for her on that special of special days to honor and thank her for the mother she was to me; but since she has been called home for many years now Mother's Day for me is just a day where beaming mothers wear their corsages to church and the congregation listens to primary children sing their little hearts out to their mothers and talk after talk about mothers.
Then for the grand finale the deacon boys hand out flowers to each and every mother.

I remember one year as this young man approached me with a flower I found myself saying, "but I'm not a mother."
He was startled and I can't remember if he still handed me the flower or if he gave it to someone else. But over the years I have found that physically I may not be a mother but in my heart I have a mother's heart; so yes, I am a non traditional mother and on days that I make it through the entire meeting I accept my little flower with pride.

Last week I had a Woe is me week.  I was not at my best.  I had been reaching for my trusted bat so that I could start beating myself up but it was just out of arms length and I was so engrossed in
"poor me" I didn't even want to reach for it; so, I just sat in my puddle of pity.

Yesterday my true blue friend called, it seems that she for the last two weeks was having a "woe is me week."
As I listened I found my heart aching for her.
She then surprised me with by throwing out this juicy tidbit,
 "You know Mother's Day is my least favorite holiday."
I was surprised because my friend had six boys who have grown up to be such remarkable young men.  When I shared my surprise and explained that I could understand why someone like me detested Mother's Day but a Mother detesting Mother's Day??
She then explained that the reason she detested Mother's Day was because in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints Mother's Day was meant for those moms who were "perfect Molly Mormons."  That brought a smile to my face as I reflected on those "Perfect Molly Mormons."

I tried to find an image of that Perfect Molly Mormon but needless to say all my Goggle search brought me was pictures of all sorts but non that described the Perfect Molly Mormon.
I did get a hit of Wikipedia and here's their definition of the "perfect Molly Mormon:

"A Molly Mormon is thought to be the "perfect Mormon woman"—an attractive[1] and chaste[2] woman whose life revolves around the family and marriage..."
(I bolded attractive cause my friend and I both do not fit society's role of attractive:))

I then found a couple of blogs where the writers wrote about their struggle with living up to "Molly Mormons" reputation.  
One even included this poem about the perfect Molly Mormon which I thought was quite cute:

"The Girl in a Whirl

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